When I was 12 years old a family friend took me for a ride in his private plane. At one point during the flight he offered me the controls. I don’t know what others would have done, but I said, “No way.”  To this day I regret I didn’t fly that plane. That decision has had a profound effect on the choices I now make.

There’s a part of me that enjoys remaining in the comfort of what I know best. Moving out of that comfort zone requires risk. The risk in the plane that day was that I would crash. I’m sure my friend was confident enough in my abilities, but on that day I couldn’t see beyond my fear.

Now that I’m older I realize how much I was holding myself back. I was afraid to try new things and take a few risks. Flying the plane that day was only one of many opportunities I passed up.

Flying the plane that day wouldn’t have made me a leader. But it has become a reminder of what I need to do to become a better leader. Because it is by taking risks and challenging yourself that you learn to be a good leader. In other words, to learn to be an effective leader, you need to be prepared to move above and beyond your comfort zone. That means accepting the risk that you might fail or perform poorly. It’s through doing (success or failure) that you become a better leader.

On that particular day, I was not behaving like a leader.